4 weeks today!

I can't believe it's already been 4 weeks since Roxanne was born. It's crazy! I feel like it's just been a few days, although I have to admit that I've completely forgotten what it feels like to be pregnant. I know that sounds bizarre, but it's true. I keep looking at the pictures on Flickr and trying to remember what my belly felt like, and I really can't. Thank goodness. Even though I have a long way to go as far as losing as much weight as I want and my belly looks sort of like a deflated zeppelin, I feel so much smaller than I used to, and I'm just not that down on myself. It's wonderful to have ankles again! They are so dainty!

Roxanne is really changing at lightning pace. She's awake more, and more aware when she's awake. We also think her face is changing. She's had a full week this week, with friends coming to visit Monday and today. Monday Jacquelyn and Evie came over (and Jesse came over later) and today my Mom came over with lunch. Then my sister and Ella and Chloe came over with Jacquelyn and Evie after they had gone to Fernbank. So we've had lots of visitors. Roxanne likes to stare at people when she's awake, so she got to stare at Kendree and my Mom for a good while. She's very intense. But wonderful. I've never felt as important as I do when she's staring at me. I realize that that sounds like something from one of those Chicken Soup for the Soul books, but it's true. I really really love being a mom.

I've been trying to have Roxanne take a bottle about once a week, and we tried tonight. I had a beer with my dinner since I knew I had some milk stored that was going to go bad in a couple of days. Of course, she won't take the bottle from me. I think it just makes her mad because she can smell the milk from me, and doesn't like to eat from the bottle. Fortunately, she will eat from the bottle when Justin gives it to her. She's still not crazy about it, but we've only got a few more weeks before she's going to be in day care and has to eat from a bottle every day. I'll still be able to breastfeed in the mornings and evenings, but during the day, she'll be eating pumped breastmilk. I found out that my office has a special "pumping lounge" for people like me. That should be interesting... I wish I didn't share an office so that I could just do it while I work, but for now, no go. However, there is no one in my office since my officemate got fired a while back, so I guess we'll see. I'm still really really really really not looking forward to having to give up my days with Roxanne. I e-mailed Andrea, her day care provider yesterday to tell her when Roxanne would be starting, etc. and had a two hour crying fit. I am sure it will get easier. For now, I just keep trying to focus on enjoying the time we have together. She's just so perfect.

First Bath!

Roxanne just had her first bath. She's been needing one for a while, but I kept chickening out and just doing sponge baths. However, she just had one of those explosive poops that ended up all over the place, and really required a bath. So we cleaned her up, and then I actually just took her in the tub with me. I have been reading about it, and a lot of books say it's a nice way to have the first few baths, since it's less stressful for the baby, and it was definitely less stressful for me. I felt like she was getting enough warmth between my body heat and the water, and she didn't fuss at all. She even ate a meal in the tub. Is that over-sharing? I never know where to draw the line... Sorry.

I put some new photos on Flickr. She's been doing lots of faces lately, so I sat with her on the couch last night and did another mini-photo shoot. Some of my favorites are seen above.

We walked around VA Highland today. It was nice. Roxanne slept in the sling, as usual, but I still think she liked it. We're going to miss Justin when he goes back to work tomorrow. Just the two of us. I am going back to work on February 11, so Roxanne and I have almost a whole month together. I know it's going to fly by though. And I still have to jump through hoops at work to ensure that they are OK with me taking that extra week and a half (I was supposed to go back on January 29). Legally, I'm allowed to have 12 weeks unpaid leave, so it shouldn't be an issue. Still, they make everything a little bit more complicated than it should be. I'll have to get that extra week and a half approved by 3 different groups of people. Even some folks in California! It's definitely worth it though. This way, Roxanne will be almost 8 weeks when she starts day care. Still not perfect, but every little bit helps.

Justin's last day of Paternity Leave

Today has been very fun for us. We got a late start (as always) but we went to Candler Park and had a nice walk. Then we walked to Dr. Bombay's, which is a super cute coffee shop in Candler Park. We didn't stay, but I got a Peppermint Mocha (decaf) coffee, which I've been craving for a month. Delicious. And Roxanne slept through the whole thing. She seems so cozy in the sling. As you can see in the photos, she is seriously sleeping in there. I'm trying to upload to Flickr frequently. Her little face changes every day, and she's really starting to look like a little person now. She's adorable.

She still hasn't shown any signs of getting a cold, and I'm almost totally better. Justin is still feeling under the weather, and has a runny nose, but I'm hoping he'll be fine in a day or two. Hopefully we won't get sick again for a while. I still want Justin to get a flu shot though. Apparently February is going to be the peak season for the flu. And it takes two weeks for the vaccine to be effective, so you do the math. He's so stubborn though... He just keeps reminding me that he tried to get one at Georgia State, but they had the time and location misprinted, and so he missed it. But that doesn't mean he can't get one now!

On a different note, Roxanne is holding her head up pretty well these days. She has been able to hold it up for short bursts since the hospital, but she is really getting strong at it already. It's a little scary. We like to hold her on our shoulder, and it's scary because she lifts her head up (usually to eat Daddy's ear) and then flops it back down again a minute later. You have to really watch her. I put this picture up since it's the closest I've gotten to showing her holding her head up. It's hard to get pictures of those kind of moments.

Three week old baby

Roxanne is three weeks old as of yesterday. It's hard to believe it's been that long! The days sort of melt together for me, and I often have NO idea what day it is. But it's lovely. I'm really enjoying spending so much time with Roxanne. I know Justin loves it, too. We went for walks yesterday and today, with Roxanne in the sling again. I'm going to try and take her out for walks at least 5 days a week. I think it's good for both of us. The weather has been so agreeable lately, and that definitely makes it easier. It's so hilly around our neighborhood, and although we walk slowly, I'm always huffing and puffing while Justin and Katie are sort of bored. I'm definitely out of shape, and carrying a big old baby around is tough, too. Roxanne still defiantly sleeps through the walks, and still makes her little whimper sounds the whole time. I always want her to look around and enjoy the scenery, but I know she can't see it yet anyways.

Justin goes back to work on Monday, and I'm supposed to go back on January 29th. We're trying to plan it so that I can take a little more time off, maybe a week or two, but it will take some fiddling with the budget to see if that's possible. My work finally told me that they didn't think I could do any work from home. I expected this, but it was still very tough to hear. I'm disappointed, and I have a lot of anxiety about handing Roxanne off. I am jealous of moms who get to stay home for six months or more with babies. I think it's good for kids to be around other kids once they get older, but I'm not sure that a six-week old really benefits too much from day care. But we have to do what we have to do. It's mathematically impossible for us to get by on one income. And I do like Andrea, our in-home day care provider. I also think I might try to adjust my work schedule so that I can be with Roxanne more when she's awake in the afternoon and evening. I'm sure we'll figure it out.

Justin and I are still dragging a little bit with our colds, but we are feeling better. Roxanne seems to be feeling better, too. My sister always says that breast milk is like miracle milk, and I'm inclined to agree. I read that when mom's are sick and worried that the baby will get sick, more frequent breastfeeding is recommended because the antibodies that the mom is producing to fight her sickness are transmitted to the baby through the milk. The more I read about breastfeeding, the more it amazes me. I'm hoping to breastfeed Roxanne for about 12 months. It's definitely tough, but she's really doing well with it, and we make a good team.

Roxanne is getting bigger and longer, and a lot of her 0-3 month onesies are a little short in the sleeves and legs. I'm excited for her pediatrician appointment, since I can't wait to see how much she's grown. Even though she eats very often and is clearly not a scrawny little thing, I worry sometimes that she's not getting enough from just me, so actually knowing her weight gain will be reassuring. It's weird to think that you are the sole source of a living thing's sustenance. Especially a living thing that you love so much.

Roxanne is still sleeping in the bed, even though I try to put her in the bassinet almost every night. She just wakes up right away. And it's so much easier for us to be in the bed together, as I just feed her laying down, and we both fall back to sleep afterwards. I think I'm probably getting close to 8 hours of sleep again. It might still be more like 6 or 7, but it's definitely tolerable. And for now, it's just sleeping and feeding. Roxanne hasn't gotten fussy for no reason during the night for a while. She sometimes gets fussy in the evenings, but it usually seems to be gas. We're lucky to have such a good baby.

Monday Morning Update

We had a nice weekend, which involved Justin staying home with Roxanne alone for a couple of hours! On Saturday, I went to my niece Ella's birthday party at a children's museum here in Atlanta (Imagine It is the name of the museum, it's awesome). I left Justin a bottle, and they made it just fine. Roxanne has been a little fussy the last few days, and has been wanting to eat almost constantly. Since I seem to have come down with a cold and Justin seems to be fighting one, I think she doesn't feel well. She hasn't been sleeping very soundly either. Poor little thing. She's not congested for now, and I hope it stays that way. We've been running the vaporizer constantly.

Yesterday we went for another walk in the nice weather. This time I carried Roxanne in the sling, which made her pass out immediately, and stay asleep for the whole walk. She was whimpering very quietly for most of it though, and she sounded like a little kitten. We think she's going through a growth spurt, and she definitely has gotten bigger (based on clothes fitting). And again, she's definitely getting cuter.

Baby Photo Shoot

Yesterday my sister came over with her fancy new camera and she kindly took lots of pictures of Roxanne. I put some of them on Flickr. We're trying to decide on one for her birth announcement. I think they look fantastic. The outfit is a beautiful white outfit that my aunt Ellen and uncle Patrick gave Roxanne for Christmas. It looks gorgeous on her! Roxanne seemed to enjoy having her picture taken, and looked at the camera for most of them.

I put some other pictures up, from our camera, which is not nearly as lovely as Kendree's camera, but I think the pictures are still pretty cute. From the photo shoot, this is one of my favorites. She has the funniest look on her face.

Happy New Year

Well, we started out 2008 quietly, but comfortably. Watching a movie and chatting. We actually don't usually do too much on New Year's, but having Roxanne this year definitely added a new level of quiet. It's definitely worth it.

Roxanne is starting to spend more time awake during the day, and her wakeful periods are starting to change a little bit. Her eyes open wider than they did before, and she can sometimes copy me and Justin when we shape our mouths into an "O" shape while she stares at us. It's so exciting! And cute, since she has these perfect little bow shaped lips that are just ridiculously tiny. She just seems to be getting more aware.

On that same line, she hasn't wanted to be in the bassinet lately. I blame myself, since she peed on the bassinet sheets a few nights ago, I had her sleep in the bed with me for a few nights before Justin got a chance to wash the sheets (he's our household hero) and now I think she doesn't want to sleep on her own. I'm still trying, but when I put her in there, she seems to wake herself up, and is kicking and fussing in no time. We'll see...

She's still eating very well, and seems to be gaining weight and getting bigger. We discovered that we have to put her in bigger socks. I've been putting her in newborn socks, but they are really just too small for her big feet. My mom gave her some 3-12 month socks, and they fit her perfectly. She's going to be a bigfoot like her dad.

She's growling at me right now. I think I better go... :)